Quirky Thinker – The Virtuous Woman (Proverbs 31: 10-15, KJV)
*DISCLAIMER: these comments are my own and derive from a subjective, quirky point of view and do not speak to the broader application of these sacred texts. Lay aside any sensitivities or do not read further. These thoughts are not meant to demean God’s Word but to illustrate the potential first thoughts of quirky thinkers like me.
When I was a young child but old enough to start listening in church services, I began hearing about this “Virtuous Woman” written about in Proverbs. It has always seemed obvious to me that I am a quirky thinker and I just supposed I was the only one who interpreted things in such a way. Things that are not funny to others are funny to me. I get rushing thoughts of one-liners at very inappropriate times. Poetry makes no sense to me and I don’t see the need to read a novel or get lost in fantasy. I like pretty things, but I usually like the odd and solitary items in a collection, not the entire collection. I am all girl, but not girly. Church was the place where it seemed I heard much more from people about religion-related social expectations of the female kind. Mind you, I was diligent at seeking obedience to scripture and my religion, after all, everything was perceived (by me) as Heaven or Hell issues, and ain’t nobody wanting to go to Hell, right? I wanted to be good, but I just often didn’t fit in. Oops, see I have already in the first paragraph strayed from my original thought. This is also one of my patterns. I am easily distracted.
It seemed that every Mother’s Day at church we heard about this “Virtuous Woman” in Proverbs. When I was younger, I probably dismissed much of the scripture as applying to older women, at least old enough to marry. Once I got married, I began to dislike this woman of Proverbs a bit, and now I think I might be a little bitter toward her (humor intended). Let me take a minute to explain my quirky and immediate response to her.
Sometimes I just want to tell her, “Sit down and relax!”
V. 10 “Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.” (My response is that if we can’t find her, she might be taking a nap or hiding from us. Leave her alone! I am not sure what the price of rubies has to do with finding this woman, but I suppose she is rare and precious. Whew! Maybe that means she has this type of virtue covered and I don’t need to be like her.)
V. 11 “The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.” (Response: Of course he trusts her. She’s too busy to get into trouble. Does the second part mean that she takes care of all his needs as well? Is there such a thing as a “Virtuous Man” who serves his wife? Let’s talk about that!)
V. 12 She does her husband good “…all the days of her life.” (Response: I’m okay with that one if we can negotiate to “most day” or “many days” because I have already ruined the “all” option. Of course, at funerals, we always hear about the deceased and the many qualities, virtues, and generosities they brought to their world. Sometimes I must look at the funeral program to see if I am at the correct funeral. Yes, it’s kind and helpful to hear good things about the deceased. It’s one of those gracious things in our culture. Maybe in retrospect, someone will speak about me “always” being kind or something. That would be nice, but it would be funnier and befitting to my personality if you all just tell the truth at my funeral. Why did my brain go a funeral example?…that’s how it works.)
V. 13. “She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.” (Response: Do they mean she goes out and finds bargains? Maybe she coupons? She works with her hands. I think I get that. I am not sure what else we have to work with. I like to work with my mind, but It’s apparently NOT the thought that counts, it’s the action that follows the thought. The NASB says this woman works “…with delight.” What!? Have you ever seen an overworked woman working with a genuinely delightful attitude? Okay, probably somewhere in time. Is that “delight” what she shows in public? I bet when she gets home she tells everyone that she is going to take a bath and get to bed, dinner is on them!)
V. 14. “She is like the merchant ships; she bringeth her food from afar.” (Response: First off, I hope you are not calling me fat by comparing me to merchant ships. Of course, that’s just a divergent thought that always runs through my head. I recognize that the analogy is about going away to get food. Why would I go “far” to get food when I can get it at any of the 3 grocery stores nearby? Does she get extra credit for going far away for food? Is there another option? It seems like she might get more credit and praise for raising her food at home. All I need is a Super Walmart or a good ol’ Texas HEB grocery store! Get me in and out of that store asap!)
v. 15. “She rises also while it is still yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.” (Response: Hooray, she DOES have help, right? She has maidens. So why aren’t they doing some of this workload? Anyway, she gets up before sunrise and feeds meat to her family? Why is the entire family up before sunrise? I think I might opt for a quick bowl of cereal. My husband doesn’t eat early in the day, so I have a great excuse for not doing this one. Of course, I’ve lost the opportunity to be “virtuous” in this regard. I hope she sleeps in some days. Here’s the thing, if you don’t want people to expect something of you then don’t do it consistently. If she does this every day or most days then it becomes the expected, typical behavior. It’s nice if she wants to do this, but you’ll get trapped, and others won’t learn how to do this if you always do it for them. I hope that makes sense to someone. SLEEP IN sometimes, girl! On the other hand, don’t get bitter about doing it if you have trained everyone that you will.)
MORE TO COME…
A Chosen Life 